The scenes or activities are limitless and commonly evolve over a period of time. Actions, locations, props or events can trigger new ideas that can be introduced immediately or at a later time – imagination is the key to an enjoyable experience when combined with a real sense of trust.
However, we recommend that a number of steps are taken in advance to ensure that the experience is enjoyable, safe and above all CONSENTIAL. It is absolutely essential to ensure that all parties consent to ALL elements of the scene, although this does not necessarily mean describing action in advance…especially as the unknown or unexpected elements of the scene are often the most enjoyable and rewarding.
We suggest that one good way to get ideas is to watch a few movies that contain BDSM activities. We have recommended a number of titles in our DVD recommendations section that may help; however, we wish to point out that most of them are sexually explicit and contain hardcore material that may not be to everyone’s taste.
The following steps indicate a guide as to what should be considered when engaging in BDSM activities:
Communication
This is an absolute must when engaging in BDSM activities. It should occur before, during, and after scenes; as it is a key element to ensuring physical and emotional comfort and protects the entire relationship between the partners.
 You may well be extremely surprised that sharing one's fantasies does not typically ruin them, but often draws the partners closer together and makes the ‘scenes’ more powerful than either partner dreamed. Communication about fantasies, whether or not the partners actually want to carry it out, can be the start of creative, exciting, intriguing play and new insights.
Cuffs and Collars by JT's Stockroom
Advising the Submissive of things to come can add a significant element to the event and can be used to deprive or tease the participant to great affect. This can include giving orders and making demands that must be obeyed, or suggesting actions that are beyond the control of the submissive and again gives them a license to submit to acts that may be beyond their preconceived boundaries or limitations.
Pushing a limit or playing near a limit is called edge play and, with consent, could be introduced in conjunction with a safe word.
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